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Topic Summary

Posted by: Emlyn Morgan
« on: December 15, 2025, 12:34:35 pm »

Sorry to read of your loss.

Best wishes from Emlyn.
Posted by: Kittykat
« on: December 07, 2025, 07:04:20 pm »

I'm sorry Jack, I know how hard it is.  What I'll say is don't be surprised if it creeps up on you when you least expect it.
Posted by: Jack
« on: December 01, 2025, 05:01:58 pm »

Thanks, DB.  I'm sorry to hear about your loss, and hope you're doing better as well.
Posted by: db105
« on: November 29, 2025, 11:49:40 am »

I'm sorry to hear this. May she rest in peace. I also lost my father this year, although it was also the end of a long illness, so in some sense I was relieved he wouldn't suffer more.

I hope you're doing well, Jack.
Posted by: HumbledBareBoy
« on: November 26, 2025, 04:59:44 pm »

My sincerest condolences! 🙏❤️ were all thinking of you here, and we wish you all of the best, too! Take care of yourself for now, and we will look forward to enjoying the pleasure of your company once more, whenever you decide you are up to it 💯
Posted by: Jack
« on: November 21, 2025, 05:11:38 pm »

Thank you all for your kind thoughts.

To be honest, I'm doing pretty well.  It's been about 15 months since Mom was first diagnosed.  She recovered from that initial bout, but it spread, the third round failed, and she was too weak to try again.  While there was a rapid decline, we've known this was coming for a while and I've had time to come to grips with it.

I never allowed my kids to be very close with my Mom, because of how she'd treated me, and I never saw any changes in her behavior.  She showed up for some holidays, since she spent many of them with her husband and his family.  My only kids who were ever close to her was Steve (the elder), whom would often join me for holidays back then, before I got married; Tommy and Caleb, who were her biological grandkids; and Parker, whose mother lived near mine, so when he first lived here, but stayed at school there, he would go to Mom's house until he could be picked up.

Much to my shock - my step-father, whom I've always thought was an emotional eunuch, and with whom I was not only not close, but felt neglected and abused, has taken it very hard, which surprised me.  No matter how I feel about him, he's still a human being, and he wasn't bad to my mom, so....
Posted by: Plagosus
« on: November 21, 2025, 01:31:01 pm »

I am sorry to hear of your loss.
Posted by: ivor
« on: November 21, 2025, 03:00:54 am »

My condolences on your loss.
Posted by: Zyngaru
« on: November 20, 2025, 01:37:41 pm »

My condolences.

Jack, right now your emotions are probably spinning out of control at times.  You might feel things that causes guilt or deep depression or any number of other things.  Being a caregiver of someone on Hospice means you see them daily, every minute of the day and watch their decline.  Mostly you have to hold back your own emotions to help them through their end-of-life emotions.  That buildup of emotions in you takes its toll.  Know, that every emotion you are now feeling most people who take care of someone on Hospice also feels once the stress of the care giving is over.  Take time to relax.  Take time to de-compress.  Give yourself time to get back on your feet.  Don't rush anything.

Having already did the end-of-life experience with both of my parents, I have some understanding how you are feeling.  It is not new with you.  We all go through those emotions.

Now that you are free of the caregiver mode, go out and pamper yourself.  Watch a movie, go to a spa if you are into that sort of thing.  DO NOT let yourself feel guilty of doing things just for you.  You earned it and deserve it, but most importantly you NEED it.

That is about as much help I can give from this distance away.

Best of everything to you.

Zing
Posted by: Kat
« on: November 20, 2025, 12:14:03 pm »

Thanks for making the announcement, Katz.

Jack, if you read this, I'm thinking of you.

Kat
Posted by: David M. Katz
« on: November 20, 2025, 09:36:50 am »

Sharing with Jack's permission.

Yesterday, Jack's mother passed away. She had been ill for a while.

Jack wanted you all to be aware.

Jack says he is doing OK but things do seem "weird" to him right now. He just has some emotions to process.